Occam’s Razor

August 30, 2007

Idiotic Depths

Filed under: idiots — lesturla @ 11:18 am

And I thought this issue’s over! Until of course Manila Standard Today chose inaction as its course of, well, action. To begin with, it’s really frustrating that Manila Standard Today chose to be silent throughout the course of this issue. Even worse, they are going to run Malu Fernandez’s column again. It seems to me that their silence is sending a very clear message: For MST, they did no wrong.

And this is where I have a problem. But let’s play Occam’s Razor:

Q: What respectable publication will publish such garbage?

A: If they had sensible editors who actually read articles before they print them, the article wouldn’t have made it in print. Take your pick: No editors or Stupid editors. Given the choices, it’s simply irresponsible journalism.

Q: What could the publishers of MST be thinking?

A: Why bother. It’s their irresponsibility and tastelessness that caused all this shit. You expect them to get right and clean after their mess? Irresponsible and tasteless publications don’t have that capability. Apparently, MST IS irresponsible and tasteless.

Q: So what do we do now?

A: They have sunk themselves so low in their inaction. Do you want to pull them out and stage a fight? Don’t. Let them sink. Don’t buy MST. Tell your friends to do the same. If you know advertizers who do business with them, convince them to pull out. But don’t ever expect them to grow up. Keep it simple. Idiocy tends to be the same poison that kills the idiot.

Sure, as an organization they have the right to choose if they fire her or not. But as publishers, for them to go all mute and dismissive of a fault that is rightly theirs and their writer’s is simply unacceptable. In this respect, MST is therefore worse than Malu Fernandez. Shame!



August 29, 2007


Filed under: drivel, friends, movies, music, travel — lesturla @ 11:12 am

I miss Manila. Not that I am terribly lonely or bored, in fact I’m neither one of those. It’s just that sometimes it kicks you in the balls so hard that you can’t ignore it anymore — I miss home. Darn it!

Now, before you go all “deep” on me about “home” being where the heart is (which is nothing but a poetic excuse for the nomadic) and get into a purely semantics debate let me make it clear: I miss my country. Home. Physical place. No heart talk here. This is not one of those days. Aren’t you glad?

Even for those who are together with family but are living abroad, it comes — the kick in the balls I mean. Although we try to avoid it as much as we could, TJ and I were discussing some of the things that we miss about home. Lookie:

  1. Powerbooks, A Different Bookstore, Fully Booked — we want books lots of them. Send us books!
  2. Driving along C-5 on Saturday mornings bereft of traffic
  3. Driving along C-5 on Friday nights with ALL the traffic
  4. Sunday afternoons in UP Diliman — those trees are phenomenal!
  5. Rare times when Megamall is not swarmed with people
  6. Walking around and deciding on which restaurant to eat at in Greenbelt 3 and 2…
  7. … And bumping into friends while making that decision
  8. Sunday lunches at the Shang (both Mactan and Makati)
  9. TJ’s shopping haunts
  10. Eluding wiseass traffic enforcers (lalo na pag coding and we just vroom pag hinuhuli na! Whatta trip!)
  11. Inuman with the gang (Kroc, and that tiny place near Makati Med, NSG, Big Sky at QC — actually kahit saan basta may…)
  12. San Mig Light! — dayum I almost forgot how this beer tasted
  13. The Fort — nights of making the rounds (dinners at Le Souffle, beers at Pier 1, then Embassy or Cuisine for more beers)
  14. Krispy Kreme
  15. SM Home Appliance Center — oo trying to imagine how our home would look like when we’re all trippy
  16. Eastwood on Sunday afternoons — swarmed with kids and fellow ‘rents, so we basically find out who recently got knocked up and is with a child
  17. Cuisine — feeling VIP kasi parati free
  18. Redbox — it’s still the only karaoke joint that has Pearl Jam’s Black in their playlist. When I visit next sana they have DMBs Grace is Gone
  19. Embassy (funny story about elections at “The Embassy” — feeling VIP rin kasi parati free)
  20. Flyovers — I don’t why pero nakaka miss lalo na the one from EDSA going to LSGH
  21. Chats with pet-owners in Eastwood
  22. Carousels for Cullen lalo na the one at Shang Ortigas
  23. Ortigas Center at 5 am weekday or early Saturday afternoon
  24. Highstreet/ Serendra before we left it was kinda the new place eh I wonder if it picked up from the initial curiosity
  25. Philippe the French stylist from F Salon — still the only stylist that doesn’t make me feel I am being played with and I always walk out happy after some sniping

I could go on and on but there’s really no place like Manila.

August 28, 2007

US Americans

Filed under: Uncategorized — lesturla @ 4:35 pm

Reposted from my Multiply. Doesn’t get old. Seen it more than ten times already but still can’t help laughing my ass out.

Miss Teen USA — South Carolina

Not that I’m being mean but this is incredibly dumb. Nervous or not — it’s unbelievable how she even manages to walk and talk at the same time. To a certain extent you gotta pity her but then to most people who don’t have maps such as the Iraq or US Americans we should help the education for our children in Asia, such as… WORLD PEACE!

August 27, 2007

The Answer

Filed under: drivel, music, play, senseless drivel — lesturla @ 1:51 pm

How deep do you want to sink yourself into it?

This was a question I asked myself one post torrential Sunday afternoon here in Hanoi. This city provides for many venues of melancholy and my apartment’s vast high rise view is no exception. So on a lazy Sunday afternoon which led Cullen on his usual Tom and Jerry frenzy and Thea on her Sweet Spy marathon, I pulled myself out of my thick blanket confused at why I keep the room’s temperature at 18 degrees only to cover myself up with layers of blanket. I haven’t had much physical activity either since the past week had been horrendously tiresome that the bed served as an irresistible invite. But instead of mobilizing myself I light a cigarette to celebrate the 3 pounds I have just gained from this sedentary weekend.

It was then that I drifted into a self effacing albeit short-lived existential drivel. This is not uncommon at all for my Sunday afternoons. I lamely asked myself, “All this, what does all this mean?” (Trust me, Viktor Frankl drove me nuts too.) Confused at my own question I took a second look of my view.

I played jigsaw puzzle in my mind with the small puddle of rain at my veranda’s tiles. Inordinately tucked in huge flower pots are my half-smoked cigarettes – I procrastinate even in finishing cigarettes. Through the glass windows I can see Thea secretly giggling over some Korean dude she watches at the computer in my home office. Farther in front of me is a city raring to aggressively claim its position in the Asian Business scene. Down the streets are motorbikes. As I further struggle for an answer I closed my eyes. The honking of motorbike horns sped through my ears and raced through my brain with irreverent steps.

I hear Sigur Ros’ Ágætis byrjun playing somewhere and suddenly I am transported to my old condo in Makati almost three years ago staring outside the veranda asking the same question: “All this, what does all this mean?” I remember not having the answer then. And now as I opened my eyes in an incredible fit of predictability and scoping from yet another veranda in another country, I still don’t have an answer. Instead I have conveniently resolved to yet another question: How deep do you want to sink yourself into it?

So I asked Thea, “Do we still have Oreos?”

August 20, 2007

Isang Dambuhalang Idiot

Filed under: idiots — lesturla @ 3:31 pm

It was too tempting to blog about this issue but tingog.com’s take on this issue is the best I have seen. So I leave it to him to fill you in.

My take: People like Malu Fernandez should not see publication. They should see a psychiatrist or an exorcist! Abnormal yang baboy na yan! Pwe!

Meantime, boycott Manila Standard Today and email their advertisers to pull out their ads. Di ba sabi ko nga yang elitism na yan ay walang naidudulot na maganda?!

The best tong mga comments compiled by Sparks:

From spanx:

PUNYETA pala itong MALU FERNANDEZ na ito eh, ang daming sinasabi, wala naman iniisip, t*ng ‘na, lahat ng mga kapwa nating Pinoy na nagsusumikap sa Dubai, na-insulto mo.

Nagawa mo pa asarin lahat ng mas mahirap sa iyo. Eh kung i-forward itong mga pa-kyut mo sa http://www.alexboncayaobrigade.com/, matuwa ka pa kaya?…And do shut your trap before I go all Sun-Tzu on your fat ass.

From stevie:

As a backgrounder, Ms Fernandez has struggled with a weight problem since birth. She has tried everything. Obviously unsuccessful, Malu, single fortysomething, has just resorted to being a bitch to get noticed. Let’s not spam her then.

From Manila Boy:

Even if the acerbic Ms. Fernandez tries to ignore all the hate mails and vehement blogs virtually chopping her up into liempo, all these intensely negative vibes will surely give her a very bad long weekend indeed.

From aika:

Truth, you say? Here’s a little glimpse of reality. The last time I checked, Philippines is a third world country and people struggle to at least eat three times a day. And some families do this by sending a family member abroad, doing whatever they can – including being miles away from their loved ones – just so their families here in the Philippines could live a freaking decent life. Here’s your reality: there’s nothing f*cking funny about that.

From Pedestrian Observer:

While Donya Buding is a class act and really a classy woman Malu Fernandez has no class, nada, zip, zilch so excuse me, comparing her to Donya Buding is the biggest insult ever. Fer cryin out loud she is not even in the calibre of a cartoon character like Miss Piggy what more with Donya Buding.

From shane:

At bakit hindi sya magrereklamo na masikip ang upuan, ang taba taba kaya nya. Kung ako sa kanya, magpapa-LIPO ako kay Vicky Belo or kay Pai Calayan!

From valkyrieangie:

puh-leeze. some people with lower socioeconomic background are better bred than you are. even if all they get to eat are noodles and rice to get by and you get to stuff yourselves with escargot and champignon (which is just the sosyal way of saying suso at kabute, noh). we may not be your target audience, we middle class people, but we can read and we know when we are being put down.

From azrael:

I am an OFW myself, and it hurts me big-time when a fellow pinoy looks down on me and judge me by mere affinity. It’s just not right. Besides, what’s wrong with selling celphones and perfumes at duty free shops? What’s wrong with using cheap ass perfumes like Axe and Charlie? What’s wrong with being loud and friendly with your fellow pinoys on a plane?? DAMMIT.. WHAT????

From jovi:

Miss… er… Blimp, I’ll have you know that I’ve read the unabridged versions of books like “Brothers Karamazov”, “War and Peace”, “Anna Karenina”, “Les Miserables”, among others, and I think those can be considered thicker than a magazine but I still cannot, for the life of me, appreciate your so – called acerbic wit, but hey, maybe it’s just me.

From Filipinowriter:

Just because she feels that she can’t make a difference, doesn’t mean it’s a lost cause. The fact that people are actually trying is much more noble, than playing aristocrat and hinting that The Philippines is a lost cause.

For easy reference, Azrael compiled this list of blogs about this topic:

Mahaderang Matapobre sa OFWs

The Devil Wears Jo Malone

Fire Malu Fernandez, Boycott Manila Standard Today and People Asia Magazine

Hoy Malu! Wait… Mal-who? Teka, sino ka ba?

Da Daily Donkey Goes to Malu Fernandez!


Still more on “La Diva Loca”

Fierce and Fabulous Ingrata

Malu Fernandez

Matapobre ba o Nagpapakatotoo lang?


That Fishy Malu Fernandez Smell

Bitter, Spiteful Snob

The Abominable Snob Woman


More on the Diva

Panawagan: Patalsikin, Boykotin

The Bigotry of Malu Fernandez and In Defense of the Filipino Migrant Workers

Let’s Spam That B*tch

You’re Bacon, Bitch!

Heskyus Us

OFW Snob

Pakitingnan naman itong nakuha kong blog pls… Kakainis!!!

Bad cholesterol, Very bad cholesterol

Malu Fernandez flies economy class

Nang magsabog ang impyerno ng kakupalan sa mundo, ang kolumnistang ito ang nakasalo

Seething with anger

August 18, 2007

The Imperfect Perfect Fan

Filed under: friends — lesturla @ 3:09 pm

It was in Cebu, during one of our many tampuhans that Thea told me about Ian. I gave her a call telling her I’m on my way to meet her when she told me she’s meeting Ian who, ever so casually she said, has won the Palanca. Twice.

Under normal circumstances I would have been excited with the idea, after all I have always looked up to the past winners with envious admiration. I’ve always imagined picking on their brains and asking them all sorts of adulatory questions like do you write longhand or do you use a pc or a mac? The idea itself would have made me ecstatic being of course a fan of literature.

But it wasn’t one of those normal circumstances. Thea and I were having a prolonged tampuhan and she’s meeting a guy whose literary accomplishments were something that will remain as unrealized dreams for me. And so I played it cool, after all I am Mr. Unaffectedly Cool in times of tampuhan.

It was several months later, when we were back in Manila in another spell of tampuhan, that Ian came back in the picture. This time around I wasn’t playing the role of Mr. Unaffectedly Cool very well. I was making her suyo. In other words, I was playing Mr. Nice who’s happily carrying countless shopping bags and putting out a smile while patiently waiting at Zara. Under normal circumstances I would excuse myself and say I need to go to the wash room when in fact I will just loiter at the Mac shop.

Thea told me she’s meeting Mark and Ian (the award winning writer) in Malate, and asked if I can drive them around. I obliged of course, knowing Mark, it’s guaranteed that we won’t have a boring moment. She tells me further that Ian flew from Dumaguete to receive yet another award. But I was too preoccupied with playing Mr. Nice that I failed to hear a number of things she told me. Perhaps my constant smiling during all those shopping was causing a strain in my brain that I was unable to process what she said. It was as though complete sentences were broken down into fragments: Be nice. Hope feel. Don’t awkward. Mark and Ian. Boyfriends.

Since I was pretty much a zombie after all the shopping, I said sure. All I can think of was something I read in a magazine somewhere “Be nice to her friends!” So I was all set to be nice and all until of course we met them and introductions were made. Mark and Thea were ecstatic to finally see each other after a long time. Of course they talked about what each other was wearing, weight issues and all (It’s amazing how they can talk about clothes, weight, make up and all in one sentence delivered in one breath!) Mark says hi and follows it with, “Les, meet Ian my Bubu!”

“Oh!” was all I could say.

There’s really nothing more than shopping that can numb my head. Turns out Ian and Mark were together and that the award-winning writer Ian that Thea met in Cebu was Mark’s whom Mark ever so excitedly introduced during that time. Great, so now that that’s out of the way then I can proceed with playing Mr. Nice.

At this point, Mr. Nice and Mr. Unaffectedly Cool somehow merged into one. Read: BIG MISTAKE!

(To be continued.Blame Vodka.)

August 16, 2007


Filed under: play, tennis, travel, work — lesturla @ 4:31 pm

There hasn’t been a tennis season more exciting than this year’s. The profusion of talent especially in the men’s field simply leaves me with no adjectives (perhaps it’s the vodka). In last week’s Roger’s Cup in Montreal, the young Serb Novak Djokovic beat the top 3 players in the world en route to capturing this year’s title. The last time this happened was years ago circa Boris Becker times. (From the top of my head I think Steffi Graf did this in the women’s field at Roland Garros in 1999 when she beat Martina Hingis, Monica Seles, Lindsay Davenport, Anna Kournikova and Venus Williams <?> as she earned her 22nd Grand Slam title).

I have been following Novak Djokovic’s rise and I am convinced that barring any injuries, he is destined to become world number one someday. The kid is extremely talented and can whip amazing winners from both wings. He also has a very interesting personality and doesn’t take himself too seriously. No toxic intensity from this kid at all. Sure it might be an absolute blast for anyone to beat Roger Federer but Djokovic has fun in the court no matter what the circumstances are and no matter who he beats.

The best part is he will be in Bangkok late next month for the Thailand Open along with Rafael Nadal, Tommy Haas and Andy Roddick. The only players in the field missing are Marat Safin and Roger Federer to complete my favorites list. Why are they my favorites? Here’s why:

  1. Roger Federer – the greatest and most complete player of all time. He’s lost quite a few times this season but for a learned tennis fan, this does not matter as much as talent and consistency does. Roger is the complete package, he is the idol of his tennis idols. How weird is that? He’s that good. Gee, how do I explain his goodness? Watch his matches.
  2. Rafael Nadal – no doubt a great talent too. His intensity on the court and his dedication to improving his craft is bound to get him to higher heights in tennis. His dominance of Roland Garros will remain for a long time.
  3. Novak Djokovic – believe me when I say that he will be world number one someday. He’s got what it takes. He will beat Rafa and Roger again for sure and when he gets that habit he will be unstoppable.
  4. Tommy Haas – again talent profusion. One of few who’s beat Federer. His movement on the court and backhand to forehand transitions are just a beauty to watch.
  5. Marat Safin – he is insane but in terms of talent, there are only a few in his company namely Federer, Gasquet and Djokovic.
  6. Andy Roddick – he sure makes watching tennis a lot of fun. No other tennis player makes post match interviews as interesting as he does.

I am seeing 4 of 6 in this list next month — here’s to hoping that none of them withdraws as they usually do when it’s an Asian tournament. Ugh!

August 15, 2007

Good News Fever Wednesday

Filed under: Uncategorized — lesturla @ 10:58 am

I am totally psyched!

1. Got some really great news from PS friends that finally gave some closure to an issue I had previously raised. Like D-oh! The freak is a perv! I wouldn’t be surprised if the ugly orc would say something like, “Fancy a fuck?” to a poor chihuahua. Escorted by guards out of the building was what I heard happened. (Why am I reacting much? I hate the freak! I am not kidding when I say “Nobody crosses Les Turla!” LOLs)

2. It’s confirmed (for several weeks already actually) and I am arranging my schedule for the rest of the year around this event:


The best-of-three set matches will be played on indoor carpet surfaces on November 20 (Tue) in a city to be announced at a later date, November 22 (Thu) in Kuala Lumpur and on November 24 (Sat) in Macao. The Malaysian match billed as the “Merdeka International Tennis Challenge” will be a tourism driven initiative held as part of the celebrations of Merdeka – the 50th anniversary of the Malaysia. Malaysia it is baby!

3. 24 Sep 2007 – 30 Sep 2007 ATP Thailand Open

Each year the ATP Thailand Open attracts some of the top tennis players from around the world who come to compete for the title. One of the tournaments on the prestigious ATP circuit, the event always brings out some top class performances and guarantees some explosive match ups!

The list of confirmed players for this year’s event includes Rafael Nadal, Andy Roddick, Tommy Haas and Novak Djokovic amongst many others

Impact Arena
99 Popular Road, Maung Thong Thani Nonthaburi 11120 Bangkok

Getting There
Road: The Impact Arena is close to Don Muang airport off Chaengwatana Road. The best way to reach the venue is by car or taxi


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August 10, 2007


Filed under: Uncategorized — lesturla @ 6:42 am

We Pinoys are suckers for things like this, I guess coz we take our English very seriously. Interestingly, when you start working in other countries you will realize that English is bastardized in countless unimaginable ways. But this one is totally hilarious, it’s like a million different idiots are speaking through this person. Hi-fucking-larious! I can’t stop laughing.

We’ ve been friends for a long time ago. We come from the same alma mother. Actually, our paths crossed one time on another. But it’s only now that I gave him a second look. I realized that beauty is in the eyes. The pulpbits of my heart went fast, really fast. Cute pala siya. And then, he came over with me. He said, “I hope you don’t mine. Can I get your number?” Nag-worry ako. What if he doesn’t give it back? He explained naman na it’s so we could keep intact daw. Sabi ko, connect me if i’m wrong but are you asking me ouch? Nabigla siya. Sagot niya, The! Aba! Parang siya pa ang galit! Persona ingrata!!! Ang kapal niya! I cried buckles of tears.

Na-guilty yata siya. Sabi niya, isipin mo na lang na this is a blessing in the sky. Irregardless daw of his feelings, we’ll go ouch na rin. Now, we’re so in love. Mute and epidemic na ang past. Thanks God we swallowed our fried. Kasi, I’m 33 na and I’m running our time. After 2 weeks, he plopped the question. “Will you marriage me?” I’m in a state of shocked. Kasi mantakin mo, when it rains, it’s four! This is true good to be true. So siyempre, I said yes. Love is a many splendor.

Pero nung inaayos ko na ang aming kasal, everything swell to pieces. Nag-di-dinner kami noon nang biglang sa harap ng aming table, may babaeng humirit ng, “Well, well, well. Look do we have here.” What the fuss! The nerd ng babaeng yon! She said they were still on. So I told her, whatever is that, cut me some slacks! I didn’t want this to get our hand kaya I had to sip it in the bud. She accused me of steeling her boyfriend. Ats if! I don’t want to portrait the role of the other woman. Gosh, tell me to the marines! I told her, “please, mine you own business!” Who would believe her anyway?

Dahil it’s not my problem anymore but her problem anymore, tumigil na rin siya ng panggugulo. Everything is coming up daisies. I’m so happy. Even my boyfriend said liketwice. He’s so supportive. Sabi niya, “Look at is this way. She’s our of our lives.”

Kaya advise ko sa inyo – take the risk. You can never can tell. Just burn the bridge when you get there. Life is shorts. If you make a mistake, we’ll just pray for the internal and external repose of your soul. I second emotion.

reposted from Lappy’s


August 7, 2007

Circular Reference

Filed under: Uncategorized — lesturla @ 1:37 am

I have finally figured out how to publish here in Multiply and get automatically imported in my Blogger and WordPress accounts.

My Blogger: http://lesturla.blogspot.com/
My WordPress: https://lesturla.wordpress.com/

Actually trial to. If this doesn’t show in my Blogger and WP accounts then well I’m a lame-o.


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